Nothing in life is ever what it really is, it’s only relative to what you expect it to be! Put in the right context the gym will make your day, but not when you were expecting a relaxing date with your spouse!
Nothing in life is ever what it really is. It’s only relative to what you expect it to be.
If you were expecting a gourmet meal and instead got fast-food, it would ruin your evening. However, if you were expecting fast-food and got a gourmet meal it would make your week.
With that in mind, people rarely marry disasters. They just marry someone who didn’t quite fit their expectations.
Let’s say you married the perfect person who greeted you every morning with breakfast in bed, a huge smile, and an extremely willing disposition to fulfill your every wish. You would still say, “I could have done better!”
I know you are all saying, “no I wouldn’t!” There’s no point in debating it because none of you are going to be married to someone like that.
More importantly, no one ever married someone who they didn’t think could use a little bit of tweaking. I mean EVER! In other words, everyone thinks they could have done better.
We have all been raised on ridiculous fairy tales like Snow White and Cinderella. We all expect to meet Prince/Princess Charming and live happily ever after.
I want you to repeat after me, “THERE IS NO HAPPILY EVER AFTER!”
Just like college, the real hard work begins when you get a job. Just like having a baby, the real hard work begins when you bring the baby home.
The reason marriage never meets our expectations is because our expectations are not just extreme they are off-the-deep-end-nuts!
That doesn’t mean you can’t be upset with your spouse about letting you down or not doing something they were supposed to do. But that disappointment should not sour the whole relationship.
If you find yourself thinking, with regards to your marriage, you could have done better. That maybe you were too hasty in marrying, and that the next one will be more what you need. Then, you need to realize this: your spouse has nothing to do with you being upset. True, they may be in the wrong, but that in no way justifies your extreme feelings.
Your feelings are bent out of shape because your expectations were unrealistic.
Sometimes we need to see a chiropractor for a spine adjustment. Sometimes we need an accountant to adjust our finances. So too, you need to go to the nearest “Bliss Seminar” for a marriage expectation adjustment.