I’m Bored””
Most people seeking advice are not really; what they are looking for is justification, retribution or some other less than noble result.
Two of my kids came to me today with, "I’m bored." This went on for a long time. It could have been ten minutes but it seemed like ten years.
I didn’t take my own advice, I gave them solutions to their problem. I thought they were looking for advice. Silly me.
Finally, and realizing my mistake, I said, "I will give you $5 if you can come up with three things you can do so that you won’t be bored." In less than five minutes they had the list.
Freud said you can’t cure anyone unless they pay for it.
However, paying doesn’t only mean money, it can mean effort. If someone has a problem and you tell them the solution, it’s invariably not going to help. They have to be invested in finding the solution (they get that when they pay for it).
When my kids put in the effort they found the solution. When I just gave them a solution it didn’t help.
I have nothing against people who seek advice, if it weren’t for them I wouldn’t need a phone. But in truth, it always boils down to this, the problems we are suffering with are the ones we are not willing to put any more effort into. Invariably, we all come to this point, where we are faced with a choice of increasing our efforts or blaming the world.
There is a solution to what you are going through, it’s just not in the world you are thinking of.