The Science of Love
I want to talk to you about one of the great unsolved mysteries of science.
Your husband.
He is clearly deficient in so many areas.
OK, that’s no mystery.
But here is the real mystery. How can he be so unabashedly beloved by his mother with all of his many faults?
Despite what he does (or doesn’t do) he is welcomed with open arms no matter how cognizant his parents seem to be of his many indiscretions.
They don’t disparage him. They don’t even given him a look. Nothing!
And I’m not finished. Don’t grandparents have eyes? Can’t they see what their grandson is really like?
And as much as that might seem like a real mystery, it’s nothing compared to this. No daughter-in-law can complain enough to you about her new husband (your son) that will change your affection for him.
No matter what the issue!
But all is not lost. Science is coming to the rescue.
Let’s start by removing any ambiguity. Your husband really is a jerk (if I know him, then please don’t quote me).
However, every scientist will tell you, that has absolutely nothing to do with your affection for him (or lack thereof). If it did, then his own parents would have disowned him long ago.
Therefore, with proper treatment, and within a fairly short amount of time, you will be jumping up and down singing the praises of your spouse.
In other words, you have within you the remarkable ability to love your husband, warts and all!
Science proves it.
You do it with your son.
Your husband has a mother as well – and she loves him just like you love your son!
If she can do it, and you can do it with your son – you can do it with your husband!
I am sure you are very well aware of your child’s shortcomings, yet none of this impacts your affection.
Many people love your husband despite his many faults. That means it’s possible. The only question is, do you want to be one of them?
So here is the scientific cure: Do with your spouse what you are already doing with your children.
All the science aside, the question is do you want to be cured?
And maybe a more mysterious question is, why not?
Why do we want to hold on to our grudges against our spouse when no one is benefiting?
The answer is, when it comes to our children we want love. And the sad truth is, that when it comes to our spouse, we want to be right.
We don’t care who is right with our children, we just want a better relationship.
It’s true then, you can have a great relationship with your spouse, your children prove it.
You can also be right.
You just can’t have both.