It’s not that your spouse can’t hear you knocking, it’s that they don’t have the key either.
How many times has your spouse been upset at you for doing the same thing over and over again? Have you run out of fingers and toes yet?
That doorbell is ringing, we can both hear it but neither of us know how to get in. just because you want to change doesn’t mean you know how to.
I know lots of people who would really like to be morning people (me). I know others who would really like to be more patient (me) or punctual (me). Some struggle with procrastination (me), others with anger (yep). There is no end to the various obstacles floating through humanity. And let’s not forget lazy (ooh – I love my pillow!). In fact, if you aren’t frustrated with yourself about the things you wish you did or didn’t do, then maybe you need to buy a full length mirror.
It’s amazing to me how people complain about their spouses when their own weaknesses are so overt.
We all can hear the doorbell, but can’t see through the window.
This is the news: everyone has a window. There is a way in to everyone.
With our children, most people understand this, even if they can’t find the window.
How does this manifest?
Simple, parents just keep trying to get through. They know that if they can just figure out the right way to say it, their child will get it.
Let me give you some ground rules to finding the window – if you have said the same thing multiple times with no change, it’s a good sign you are standing outside the front door on a cold rainy night and no one can hear.
One more point. The window is reflective. Which means, if you think everyone can change, then you know you can. Alternatively, if you think there are some people who simply cannot change, then you are similarly limiting yourself. You are, by definition, going to think there are some things about yourself that just can’t be changed.
I could write a book on why the people who complain how closed minded their spouses are, seem so stuck themselves, but I have to find space for the Mulsanne (Bentley) that just showed up.